After a week’s reprieve following the 5-day intensive at UCSD, ED launches a fresh attack. He is propelled into action because Lauren is gaining weight, and more than expected (great!). Today she is oppositional, and everything is Mom’s fault. “I’m sick of chicken.” “Yuck, I won’t eat ........” “Why did you say I couldn’t share an apartment with my college friends? Now I have nowhere to live.” “I’m frustrated.” “There’s no incentive to gaining weight faster.” “I just want to get out of the house.” After responding calmly to a continuous deluge, my patience expires. Heart racing, I leave the room and remind myself that we CANNOT debate with ED! It’s an exercise in futility leaving us angry, sad, and completely depleted. ED raises his ferocious head unexpectedly and lashes out. It’s hurtful and exhausting – we struggle to survive against the onslaught.
This is not Lauren. Where is she, and when will she come back?
I miss her.
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